If your partner, your friend, your family member come to you for help, if they ask for your assistance, if they give you permission to offer your niceness to them, you still have to be careful.

Make sure you’re not trying to steal the glory from them.

Always push the responsibility for solving the problem back to them.

You can assist them, encourage them, and support them, but don’t do it for them.

Make sure that if somebody’s upset, it’s their job to deal with being upset. You can be there with them, but don’t solve it for them by being funny or distracting them. Let them be upset—just make sure they’re not upset alone.

Don’t kid yourself into thinking your niceness truly benefits others. All it does is give them temporary highs.

If you really want to benefit others, put yourself first.

Take care of your own needs so that nobody else has to, and so that when you do help someone, you’re coming from a place of strength.

To dive deeper into this topic, check out the original video here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jKg6-O7hqSA

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